The energy in the woods was palpable. (tripping with Ben was incredible). to let our souls cry out and merge and bend and blend with the universe with love was beautiful... I've never seen the sky and the stars react to my energy... Or felt the earth embrace me as part of it... My belief in a collective consciousness only grew... The earth is an organism all its own and we came from it!! It is our ultimate provider! Let it be raised for people and creatures to love it and make it thrive. How cool would it be to be the patron saints or ambassadors of a loving, peaceful planet? Just Imagine :) Our potential to take care of it better grows as the power within us does. We can create galaxies and shooting stars of our own. You are constantly continuing to create your reality. Don't be afraid to love everything you see and feel in each moment because you are alive!
The hillllssssss are aliiivvvvvvveeee with the sound of musiiiiiicccc, with songs they have sunggggg for a thousand yearrrrrssssss.
And no, I am not still frying my balls off. Simply alone, for the first time in ages with peaceful time to reflect. Oh to wake up in bed and have the day! I haven't even started writing at all as much as I want to (need to)...or creating in general. It's too much fun with all this practicing of creation going on ;) I just need the time to freaking miss Ben too!!!
Its uncomprehendable to me that I have spent almost every waking moment with Ben since we met. How do 2 lives merge so instantaneously? We are merely on 3 months and we literally have had only one night apart since we started and I can literally tell you all of the times we've been apart more than 3 hours... It's like growing an extra appendage, but an extremely hot one you want to have inside you all the time. (dirrrrty) My tolerance for people in general is not usually this constant (nor has it been lately). I am a cave dweller and need to have that space to curl up in the dark sometimes. I am an extroverted introvert and to have the time to dive into myself without Ben around is not only necessary but blissful :) The understanding of this has been a rock and a hard place for me, because I love Ben so soo much and I love experiencing the world with him, even in the most minute and intimate of details. But not having enough of myself boils over at some point and I can honestly say Ben has seen me at my worst (so far) and we've worked through it and I'm pretty sure he still loves me :). There is this insecurity in me that is naive in love that I need to bite in the bud because it is a horrible anxiety i let take over me....I want all my filters to be from Love and not fear!
I defiantly was a bit mean to Ben this week. I was sick with Pine Fever and he took excellent care of me... But I got to this point where I was just so sick and miserable I didn't want to have to be around anyone... I was doing the master cleanse (liquid diet) and at one point Ben made me eggs in a basket (and the holes were heart shaped <3) and I yelled at him for making me breakfast... mean mean Nicole. Hopefully mean Nicole is gone because I am again felling wonderfully like myself again. Lots of love to share :)
OH and I should mention that Ben got a job (thank you Kenya I lovvvee you) and he started today!!! YAYYYY!!!!! Hence the peace and quiet... but funny how much even the littlest absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Monday, September 5, 2011
Soulmate
When becomes Where!
as What begins to reside in me!
as an expanse into great feeling!
these new realms to reside in!
as What seeks Love,
in love of our circumstance,
our Life seeking to live in Love
to thank the universe for this Life without words!
Let two points come together!
where love sparks Love!
and carries us to a Path,
from the relationships created between
two lost souls,
finding the rest of themselves
through and from,
the gravity of this Bond
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
The words of our story hold no understanding of treasures riddled in the sense of this love, there is no adventure I could exaggerate about us, that could be a true example of my love for Nicole and the deep communion that brings me close to the sense and understanding of Love. This is okay with me anyways, since I prefer to write in aphorisms. I like the freedom to use words any way I want, I find its important in order to relate a system of words that can portray the truth of this understanding without limitations. In order to coerce any mind, to the true sense the feeling that such a bond does harbor. Truly, I hope that my words inspire you to find your soulmate. Do not hesitate when you meet, for you will find your better half within each other.
I would like to close this entry with two fairly important personal aphorisms, understandings that I live my life by and words that I believe to carry truth and harbor positive relationship to all. The first is about seeking yourself in every moment, by being yourself as best known to yourself. And, how it's more about having already taken the time to know yourself and to be ready to be yourself, in order to carry yourself to more of what you truly seek as an entity, a motion in this universe. The second, is about the importance of realizing how damaging, holding onto and carrying negative energy can be to your mind. And, it's also something of a mantra I once often used as a way to create a more honest relationship with the world around me.
I love you Nicole! My soulmate! My muse! You spur my chariot!
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
how do you become what you are
when the world seeks what is not from you
to be what you are, as known by yourself,
in search of a closer connection_
is to prepare to be what you are,
before the next moment is cast_
and thus by being oneself,
in understanding what is known to yourself_
the relationships you create in each moment birth,
more of what is sought by you,
by the sense of what you ordain true _
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
shadows of past
will trap you back
holding you from now
emersing you in could-be's
would-be's of uncertainty
Do not hold grudge
Do not hold spite
Do not hold assumption
Do not blind yourself with your own mal-content,
your mis-consumption of the world at hand,
will drown you in the sorrow of your ego
as What begins to reside in me!
as an expanse into great feeling!
these new realms to reside in!
as What seeks Love,
in love of our circumstance,
our Life seeking to live in Love
to thank the universe for this Life without words!
Let two points come together!
where love sparks Love!
and carries us to a Path,
from the relationships created between
two lost souls,
finding the rest of themselves
through and from,
the gravity of this Bond
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
The words of our story hold no understanding of treasures riddled in the sense of this love, there is no adventure I could exaggerate about us, that could be a true example of my love for Nicole and the deep communion that brings me close to the sense and understanding of Love. This is okay with me anyways, since I prefer to write in aphorisms. I like the freedom to use words any way I want, I find its important in order to relate a system of words that can portray the truth of this understanding without limitations. In order to coerce any mind, to the true sense the feeling that such a bond does harbor. Truly, I hope that my words inspire you to find your soulmate. Do not hesitate when you meet, for you will find your better half within each other.
I would like to close this entry with two fairly important personal aphorisms, understandings that I live my life by and words that I believe to carry truth and harbor positive relationship to all. The first is about seeking yourself in every moment, by being yourself as best known to yourself. And, how it's more about having already taken the time to know yourself and to be ready to be yourself, in order to carry yourself to more of what you truly seek as an entity, a motion in this universe. The second, is about the importance of realizing how damaging, holding onto and carrying negative energy can be to your mind. And, it's also something of a mantra I once often used as a way to create a more honest relationship with the world around me.
I love you Nicole! My soulmate! My muse! You spur my chariot!
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
how do you become what you are
when the world seeks what is not from you
to be what you are, as known by yourself,
in search of a closer connection_
is to prepare to be what you are,
before the next moment is cast_
and thus by being oneself,
in understanding what is known to yourself_
the relationships you create in each moment birth,
more of what is sought by you,
by the sense of what you ordain true _
___________________________________________________
****************************************************************
shadows of past
will trap you back
holding you from now
emersing you in could-be's
would-be's of uncertainty
Do not hold grudge
Do not hold spite
Do not hold assumption
Do not blind yourself with your own mal-content,
your mis-consumption of the world at hand,
will drown you in the sorrow of your ego
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